There just aren't enough hours in my days.

And they are going by much to quickly.
Half through June already.
Sheesh.
I almost feel as if I should never sleep.
I nearly don't most nights - only a few hours randomly.
Some say it's old age coming on.
Shit if 46 is old - I am toast.
Maybe it's disease.
If so, I don't want to know.
Others at work seem to think it has to do with our jobs imminent end
whenever that may be.
(although I was told today that my position may be continued for another eight weeks)
*shrugs*
If so, great.
If not, such is life.
No guarantees.

If it all ended in a week or so, I'd have no regrets.
I am kinda ready for a break again,
perhaps to enjoy the summer.
Then return later if they call me back, or not and move on.

I've felt the urge to go, to move, to change and try something new for a long time.
It's only been a matter of time, and money, and the situation or events timing to all occur in synchronisation - like the lining of the planets.
Maybe it's astrological?
Fuck knows.
Hormonal?
Maybe.
I have such mixed feelings about staying any longer
yet keep finding myself doing so for various reasons.
Weather certainly is not one of them.
People are.
Or are they?

All it would take sometimes is just one to say, "stay" or "c'mere"
maybe deep down that is what I want, someone to persuade me.
Or to care enough to.
Well, besides my parents..lol.
Having a job lined up and the house sold would help too.
But that brings me back full circle.
There aren't enough hours in my day to prepare it all.
Then I think, how many more years can I take this.
Perhaps if I set a goal of - by fifty or before.
I know by then for sure I HAVE to be GONE.

I have a heap of pics to post from the weekend
Just not enough time in the day to mess with pullin them off the camera on this laggy laptop and editing them as it's already 12:20am.

...to be continued...